3 Apr 2014

How To Live The Good Life And Have No Regrets When You’re Old

Angelo Agathangelou: Thanks to Daniel for the following common sense article and advice to break the grip of shame and other self imposed limitations. ..and some links to various other bricks of logic.

By Daniel Efosa Uyi: After 14 months away I find myself back in the the UK for a brief visit. Family and friends, hi and bye, that type of deal.
Visiting is fine and dandy but I won’t have any regrets when I get on a transpacific plane and head back out into the wild.
I don’t have any “hard feelings” about the UK, I was born here to my Nigerian parents so that makes me a Nigerian too but I find my choice to live abroad to be one of the better choices I have ever made.
I get asked all the time why I don’t live in UK but rather choose to live abroad.
I’ll tell you why, in the simplest manner I can….
I don’t live in the UK because I don’t want to.
I live a life of choice and I have chosen to live abroad.
When you have the choice, the ability to do anything, you start to ask yourself questions like “why?”.
  • Why do I live here or why do I live there?
  • Why am I working this job I hate?
Etc… When you can answer the “why” question you may realize you have no reason to do what you are doing.
You may realize you have the power to choose.
You may realize one simple fact of life: you can change the things you don’t like. You may realize that you aren’t stuck.


There are those people who’ve gone past the blooms of their youthful and energetic days and are now living a life of wishful regrets because of the things they wished they could have done when there was still time:
  • I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life other people expected of me.
  • I wish I took time to be with my children more when they were growing up.
  • I wish I had the courage to express my feelings, without the fear of being rejected or unpopular.
  • I wish I would have stayed in touch with friends and family.
  • I wish I would have forgiven someone when I had the chance.
  • I wish I would have told the people I loved the most how important they are to me.
  • I wish I would have had more confidence and tried more things, instead of being afraid of looking like a fool.
  • I wish I would have done more to make an impact in this world.
  • I wish I would have experienced more, instead of settling for a boring life filled with routine, mediocrity and apathy.
  • I wish I would have pursued my talents and gifts.
And the list goes on…
But until a person can say deeply and honestly, “I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday,” that person cannot say, “I choose otherwise.”

Everyone has made poor choices or done something in their past that could possibly be labeled as “regrettable.” But, think about it. The fact that you are now able to look back and realize that a mistake or mis-step occurred means you have learned a valuable lesson. Some of my choices may have landed me in unpleasant circumstances, but experiencing these things certainly built my current character. I wouldn’t be where I am today if it weren’t for those character-building situations. Mistakes are stepping stones to an evolving life. No need for you to sink into regret or despair — keep your chin up.
In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing. The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are so many ways to be brave in this world. Sometimes bravery involves laying down your life for something bigger than yourself, or for someone else. Sometimes it involves giving up everything you have ever known, or everyone you have ever loved, for the sake of something greater.
But sometimes it doesn’t.
Sometimes it is nothing more than gritting your teeth through pain, and the work of every day, the slow walk toward a better life.
That is the sort of bravery you must be aware of.
You can take an aspect of your life you don’t like or enjoy and make it an aspect that you do enjoy. Just by making a choice. Instead of letting things happen to you you can choose what you do.
You can live a life of choice, like I do.
Choice always existed but it took me nearly 20 years to realize “wait a second, I can choose my fate. I can live the life I want to live“.
I don’t have to live in the UK, I can live anywhere.
So I did. Simple as that.
Do you know how many times I’ve heard “I want to do such and such but I’m stuck in this city“?
I’ve heard it many times and I have the answer right here…
Move!
Get in a car or a bus or an airplane and go somewhere else. Complaining about something you can easily change is pathetic.
“I just don’t have any options like you” is what they always seem to say. Like I was born on a yacht in international waters or something silly. I was born in Canterbury, England. Population 50,000. I’m from nowhere just like everybody else.
If I have the power to choose so do you.

Maybe you don’t take advantage of the gift of choice, but it’s there. Unless you do something silly like get locked up in jail you’ll always have it.
If you aren’t living the life you want it’s not the fault of the city you live in, your mom and dad, your girlfriend, your employer, or your dog. It’s your fault. All you ever had to do was choose the life you wanted.
All you ever had to do was make the choice.
I think it’s all said and done by now, my final word is this :The choices you make now, the people you surround yourself with, they all have the potential to affect your life, even who you are, forever.
Always remember that.
Have a great day and if you like this post, don’t forget to check out any of these my other posts below:
Daniel Uyi.

Source 


Angelo Agathangelou: For me, Daniel is preaching to the converted. Life is exciting. ...and fear (insecurity) is like fire, if you control it and channel it you will have immense power if you let it burn out of control it will destroy you. Insecurity does have its place and has, I believe, preserved us until this point, we should respect the attribute and learn to better understand it's implications.

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FEAR IS LIKE FIRE - FINK

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